As I made my ablution the following day for the Fajr prayer, I noticed her toothbrush lying next to the basin and my heart sobbed.. Breakfast felt cold despite the hot chai tea, toast and strawberry jam.. All that could be heard was the clutter of forks and spoons hitting ceramic dishes… No one uttered a word the entire meal except for the occasional, “can you please pass me the…..”
The morning slipped away and zuhr time came and went..
People came, gave condolences and left, not one of them staying over 25 minutes..
They had their usual lives to go back to, and this was just a by the way thing for them..
It was then, that a realization hit me.. People are better actors than you would ever imagine.. I decided to write in my journal about this, but 9 likes into it, I tore out the page and cried myself to sleep..
The next day had a similar timeline of events and then I realized, this was pointless, me thinking the clock is gong to stop because I lost a loved one, hoping that this was all an illusion, questioning why… I needed to come to terms with what happened and get a grip….. I guess I was my own night in shining armor..
-YOUR SISTER IN ISLAM