He went on and on for about 10 minutes.. He said everything that goes wrong in our lives is because of me and that I was the biggest mistake he could have made.. At this point my heart shattered.. Invisible blood spilt everywhere as he took a sword and sliced through my heart.. I couldn’t take this anymore.. My swelled eyes rained salt water down my face and found itself on my lap.. Still.. His hard black eyes never turned a lighter brown.. He reminded me of all the mistakes I had made in my life and went on to say that I was the worst child he ever encountered.. My mum came in the room and tried to calm him down, but to no avail.. She eventually helped me to my feet and took me out of the room… We jumped into her car and went to my Kalas house.. She opened the door and immediately knew that the root cause of this was my dad.. She made me a hot cup of tea while I explained to her what had actually transpired.. Mum went back home.. Just as I was telling her the story,my cousin Muhammed walked through the door from soccer practice.. He immediately noticed my tears and rushed over to hug me.. I cried on his shoulder while kala made baby Malaika sleep..
After that, she came and spoke to me with Muhammed chipping in here and there…
He’s a year elder than I am and is finishing school this year. I never had a biological big brother, but he pretty much covers up for it. He likes Salmaan and knows him quite well too.. He understands the kind of relationship we have and he cautions me when I do go off the rails.. So he decided that I should tell Salmaan what happened.. After I debated with him, he final,t convinced me that he was right.. So I decided to call on Salmaans phone.. Under normal circumstances, I would have called on the house phone, but not today.. I would have burst out crying on the phone with his mum most probably.. So I called his cell phone..
He picked up and was a bit surprised to hear my voice..
Aliya?? You okay? Don’t sound well?
Oh.. No.. Umm., actually..
And I burst out crying.. I hate myself..
Aliyaa?? What’s wrong?? Please don’t cry.. Where you?
I’m at my Kalas house..
I didn’t need to say anymore. He knew exactly what had transpired..
Listen, love, I’m sorry.. This was all my fault and I know he probably said things that hurt you, but I want you to know that all that he said was mere anger and that we all still care about you and love you.. Don’t let it get to you..
I guess I just needed someone who listened to me and knew me.. He was more than a friend and I think I needed it that way.. Because I wasn’t equipped for something like this, but I guess he was.. I didn’t want to go back home, so I took one of Muhammeds Pj’s and slept with Lidfiyyah.. I tossed and turned, admiring her chandelier because I couldn’t sleep.. Eventually I found myself on YouTube… The stuff you find on this thing.. Some people must get lives..
I eventually fell asleep after watching millions of videos,. Waking up for Fajr was sooooo difficult the next morning, kala literally dragged me out of bed., I read my salaah and didn’t bother learning quran because when you this tired, even 1st para is difficult.. I jumps back on bed and slept.. At about 11, someone came to wake me up.. I guess this was the new helper because I never knew who she was.. She came into the room and asked if I was okay and if I wanted anything…
After this I could not go back to sleep.. So I got up feeling much better than I was last night and headed to the kitchen.. Through the window shutter, I could see people… Like familiar people.. I turned on my werewolf hearing and turns out it was Salmaan and my cousins friends.. Really?? Muhammed just had to… I ignored it and continued gazing around the kitchen, while Samantha made me a hot cup of tea… 😍
Just then, Muhammed walked into the kitchen to get a coke..
Oh, you up.. How you feeling?
Not so good since there is people here and I’m dressed like this…
Salmaans going to see you like this everyday once you’ll married, so he might as well get used to it,. 😜
Oh shut up.. By the way where’s kala?
She went over to your house..
I don’t know… She just said that she can’t let this happen anymore and she left..
Oh okay.. Well umm.
And before I could finish my sentence, Salmaan walked through the door, yelling
Mo.. You making the coke??
He sought of stopped when he saw me.. And then casually remarked
Nice pj’s.. Very girly I must say..
I know right
And they left the kitchen, with him winking at me as he exited the door..
Just as I was putting my mug in the sink, I heard kalas Merc pull in the driveway and a sense of anxiety enveloped me.. What did she say? Who did she speak to?
I hurried to the front door and was met with a women who looked like she just won the Olympics.. She had this huge smile on her face and hugged me as soon as she entered..
“Umm.. Kala what’s going on?”
Oh.. My baby, I convinced your dad that he needs to see a phycologist and that he needs anger management lessons.. Can you believe that he actually agreed.. I guess it was my stern voice, but it anyway did work..
Oh, that’s wonderful.. Jazzakallah so much..
You going to be saying that a million times when you see what’s on the dining room unit.. I ran into the dining room not paying attention to the group of boys playing cards and found myself at the unit..
There before my eyes was a pandora charm.. Daughter, Father charm… Yippee one more to add to my bracelet..
I went home eventually, like at night, and I jumped into bed, after showering and kissing mum and dad goodnight. As I turned off my side lamp, there was a knock on the door.. I wasn’t afraid this time, so I said come in..
There stood dad.. A box of red Lindt and a tear in his eye..
I’m sorry Doll.. I guess I took my anger out on you.. I’m really sorry
.. As I heard his footsteps disappear, there was a smile on my face. The smile of pure gratitude and the smile that’s like no other smile..
– YOUR SISTER IN ISLAM